Have you ever found yourself afraid, lost and not knowing what to do? I can look back on so many occasions in my life where I was lost and looking for something. The fear of not knowing or lacking a plan would bring me to cling to the nearest thing that looked safe. While sometimes it turned out to be a good thing, there are plenty of times that it turned out to be harmful for me in some way. Looking back at a time that I was 6 years old, I remember one of the first illustrations of making a bad decision in a time of fear.
Running into Fear
I grew up going to church and often times on Wednesday nights I would have to stay later with my brother while my mom would have a meeting. While I often enjoyed the time playing in one of the rooms with my brother, this one night was much different. I was playing by myself with a ball; bouncing it back and forth off the wall trying to catch it when I realized the room was very quiet. Looking around I found out I was the only one there. As a six year old, my first response was to yell out for my brother “Nick, where are you? This isn’t funny!”
After a few attempts to try to get my brother to come out I began to panic. Tears started to stream down my face and I only knew how to handle this one way – find my mother. I took off to the meeting room, collected myself at the door and walked in. A sea of faces greeted me as I began to cry once again. Looking around the room I finally saw my mom. I made my way around the tables, chairs and people until I was finally in a straight path. I ran up jumped on my mom and buried my face in her lap. After a few minutes of sitting and getting my back rubbed, I was calm and finally felt okay to look up. With a smile on my face and a plan to tell on my brother I looked up at my… YOU’RE NOT MY MOM! I had jumped onto the wrong lap and fear filled me once again as I got off and just stood there crying.
Finally picked up and brought out of the room, I had to do several checks to make sure that I was truly with my mom this time. She eventually calmed me down and the fear I had slowly left (not without a few nightmares of me being with the wrong mother first.)
While it is no longer as easy to see as running to the wrong mother, there are still times that I need to check what I am reaching out to in order to find comfort, peace, and strength. There are still times I realize that I am holding on to the wrong thing, however, I am so blessed to have found a constant source of comfort and peace. One that picks me up and calms me much like my mother did as a child. This source comes from my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. It was only a month ago that we got to celebrate the Easter story. One where the Son of God came and died for the sin of the world, in order for those who believe in their hearts and confess with their mouth that He is Lord, to become children of God! Pure and Blameless in His sight. Jesus died for us. While the fear of death can take a grip on us, we have a God who has conquered this fear of death. For on Easter we celebrate that Jesus was raised from the grave and through Him we to will rise. We can have a comfort, find peace, and seek refuge in the one who gave it all for us. We can conquer our fear in Jesus Christ our Lord!
So now I leave you with this question: What are you holding onto?